When it comes to carrying out a heist, criminals have to be at the top of their game. They have to observe, analyze and carry out the perfect plan, in order to evade the law. However, not all crooks are as smart as we think. Some of them don’t even possess enough IQ to understand how things work. Here, we have gathered a list of 10 criminals who makes us question how they managed to survive for so long. Thanks to their unintelligent decisions, we are able to enjoy some funny stories.
1. A young “would-be” robber decided to rob a grocery store. After the alleged robbery, as he was fleeing the scene, he unwittingly left his wallet and photo ID.
On February 9, 2014, police were dispatched to a Vons store in Pasadena, California, after 911 received a call about a robbery. Steven Diaz, 18, was trying to impress his friends as well as have a few drinks with them, when he decided to shoplift. According to police reports, the suspect went into Vons and exited the store without making an effort to pay for a bottle of wine. When a security guard confronted him, they got into an argument, where Diaz accidentally dropped his wallet along with his ID.
When police arrived, they were quick to find the thief’s wallet and identify him. Authorities went to Diaz’ home but he wasn’t there. A few hours later, authorities were able to establish contact with him and convince him to turn himself in. (source)
2. An intruder who just wanted to clean himself.
On November 28, 2018, DaPatrick Pharms, 24, decided to break into a house in southwest Houston, Texas. The owner was away for the holidays, but had informed the neighbors about his plans. When a neighbor heard the sound of glass breaking, he called the police, who were quick to arrive at the scene. Officers entered the house with precaution but were surprised to see the 24-year-old in the master bathroom taking a soak in the tub. Apparently, he just wanted to take a warm bath. (source)
3. In 2014, Justin Stansfield broke into a garage, took out his dentures and helped himself to some popsicles. After enjoying the popsicles and finding some valuables, he left the scene without his dentures; leading to his arrest.
Justin Stansfield, 38, broke into a home in Mirfield, West Yorkshire, hoping to find some valuables. After gaining access to the garage, he discovered a mini fridge with some drinks and popsicles inside. Stansfield made himself at home, took out his dentures and enjoyed the drinks and popsicles. Once he finished that, he went through the garage and found valuables that he could sell. Unfortunately for him, he forgot his dentures and a few days later, the owner of the house discovered them. Authorities were able to use dental records and discover than Stansfield was the culprit. He was arrested and jailed for 16 months at Leeds Crown Court. (source)
4. Graham Price, an ex-Halifax bank manager, took £7 million from the bank’s safe to fund his addiction to horse racing and left a signed “Thank You” note with his signature.
Graham Price, 58, was obsessed with horse racing. In an effort to fund his obsession, he convinced investors to entrust their life-savings to him and even convinced many elderly people to remortgage their houses in an effort to get his hands on some extra money. In 2005, he decided to fund his obsession with the money encased in the bank’s vault, £7 million that is. After emptying the vault, Price left a note with his signature, explaining: “Borrowed, seven million pounds. Thank you”. He was arrested soon after the discovery and the branch closed down. Price was sentenced to serve 12 years in prison for his deceptive behavior. (source)
5. In 2009, a crook stole two cash registers from Captain’s Galley Seafood restaurant in Washington DC. As he was leaving, the cash register tape unrolled and left a trail straight towards his apartment. Authorities followed the paper trail and found a man trying to pry open the cash register inside his apartment.
It’s not unusual for robbery suspects to get away with the loot. However, it’s unusual for them to leave behind such an unusually long trail that leads straight to their apartment. Donny Guy stole two cash registers from Captain’s Galley Seafood restaurant on 16th Street, NE, and made an escape on foot. When authorities arrived, they noticed an unusually long trail of white paper that was leading to a shabby apartment some 50 yards away. When an officer looked inside the apartment, he saw Donny struggling to pry open one of the cash registers with a screwdriver. Authorities were quick to grab the culprit at his own house. (source)
6. A 20-year-old burglar broke into an apartment wearing gloves and a mask to hide his identity. He ensured that he left no clues behind, until he was making his escape and he decided to chug down a glass of orange juice to quench his thirst. Police were able to use DNA analysis to apprehend him.
In 2011, James Moorer, 20, had the perfect plan. He broke into an apartment and managed to grab any and all valuables. What he didn’t know was the fact that the residents of the apartment were sleeping upstairs. When they heard the commotion, they called 911, who quickly arrived at the scene. James, who has had 12 prior convictions, had no plans to stick around. He quickly chugged down a glass of orange juice, left it on the counter top and made an escape. When authorities arrived, they saw that the crook took off with all the valuables but also left behind something crucial; his DNA. After sending the evidence to a lab, they were able to find a match and quickly apprehend James. (source)
7. A “Genius” young man decided to siphon gas from a police cruiser, take a picture of his actions and post it on social media; which went viral and eventually led to his arrest.
Michael Baker, 20, from Kentucky was an “extraordinary” man with “extraordinary” capabilities. Some called him a “genius” for his actions that took place in 2012. Baker and his girlfriend Joann Sandelin, thought that it would be funny to take a picture of Baker siphoning gas from a police cruiser and post it on social media for some likes. The image, which shows Baker siphoning gas from a Jenkins Police Department squad car, went viral within hours and authorities became aware of it. Baker was arrested, spent the night in jail for the offense and was charged with theft by unlawful tanking. After his arrest, his girlfriend claimed that it was all a joke which went horribly wrong. (source)
8. Polish author Krystian Bala thought he had pulled off the perfect crime. After taking another life, the arrogant man went on to write a novel about his acts, including grim details of the incident. When authorities read the novel, they received all the evidence they needed to bring him to justice.
In 2000, Poland was gripped by one of the biggest crimes that had ever taken place in its history. An unknown man was responsible for taking the life of a woman in the most gruesome way imaginable. The case went cold for almost seven years until Krystian Bala, a novelist, wrote a thriller explaining the details which was similar to a case that took place seven years prior. Apart from the already known details by the public, authorities also noticed that his book mentioned several things that authorities had not released to the public. When confronted with the evidence, Bala confessed and was subsequently arrested to serve a 25 year sentence. (source)
9. In 2008, 51-year-old William K. Anderson went to collect his welfare check in a brand new Hummer. When officials suspected foul play, they informed the police, who ran the license plate and found that it was indeed a stolen vehicle.
William K. Anderson from Knoxville, TN went to obtain his welfare benefits in a Hummer, bearing Michigan license plates. When an observant employee at the Lee County Department of Social Services noticed this unusual behavior, he decided to inform authorities about his suspicion. Anderson, however, had already collected his benefits and took off. The employee managed to write down the vehicle description including license plates and the Sheriff’s deputies started searching for the vehicle. It wasn’t long before authorities tracked down the vehicle to a local Walmart.
Police officers then setup surveillance around the vehicle and waited for Anderson to drive it. Once he entered the car and started driving, they made a traffic stop, arrested him and charged him with possession of stolen property. (source)
10. On November 22, 2017, a 46-year-old man broke into a home and took all valuables inside. After working hard for hours, he decided to take a break and eat some Doritos in the homeowner’s bed when he accidentally fell asleep. He was woken up by police officers.
We have seen several cases of “sleeping on the job” gone wrong, however, this is an unusual case where a burglar decided to rest inside the very home he broke into. Steven Walker from Scotland was living by himself during the incident. After returning from a doctor’s appointment, the man was surprised to find a thief, napping comfortably in his bed after going through his chips and leftovers. Walker immediately notified the police, who arrived and arrested him for breaking and entering. (source)